The last week has been an interesting one as I prepared for the next study weekend which I’ll write about either tomorrow or Tuesday but one pretty big surprise this week has been just how well my spanking centred Tumblr has taken off since its launch in November being a spin off of a openly Cg/l Littles/Middles one. So far it has gained in that time 4o3 followers which when you bare in mind it’s parent Tumblr has 408 experienced a bit of turbulence as ironically I learnt more about me by exposure to other sides of Little and Middle life from just being on site following other peoples accounts in that fairly liberally minded site.
Going back to last week’s studying I have had plenty of opportunity to properly reflect on both why it was I refused to start the work and having done that how that how I was disciplined for it because in order for me to go forward, I have to process this rather than doing what I’ve done for like eons blanking it out as if it didn’t happen.
Part of the reason I didn’t start was the belief I couldn’t achieve but the bulk of it was the idea I have that because of my disabilities I need not start being exempt from any requirement to even try because saying ‘I have a disability’ was the accepted opt out with so many people and so used it.
I used my disabilities to justify what was plain old-fashioned laziness, that preference not to do everyday things that you do that you may even have do because even you have try things because I could and too many just accepted it.
I am sorry for how I have not only let myself down but for allowing you to do the things I am meant to do as well but decided not to.
MY SPANKING WAS VERY PAINFUL BUT DESERVED AND OUGHT TO HAVE HAPPENED YEARS AGO
The scolding was delivered before the spanking bared
BEING SCOLDED WITH MY KNICKERS DOWN MADE ME FEEL THE SHAME MORE AND GOT THE MESSAGE RIGHT THROUGH
This week I got started right away and did very well and have Math today to attempt.
I CAN DO MORE WITH THE RIGHT HELP WHEN I ALLOW OTHERS TO HELP ME
That is what being a responsible disabled adult middle is all about