Here at last is a kind of account of the other bits from the period I was away and which ideally I’d of published and entry last Wednesday/Thursday other than with getting ready and all that I simply run out of time trying to cut everything down into a small case and a couple of tote bags. Main post: Halloween and Bonfire Party 2016
There were a couple of things I think worth putting here which is that on this visit I actually had to do contribute in kind and do things such as helping to make the meal I was to eat and also the cake making which was a first with me because people are caring enough to make me do things which is hard when you’ve spent most of life expecting others to.
It’s not just independence although to be honest we’re all interdependent when you think about it with degrees of independence that are seldom total. It’s really about learning to contribute, learning to be an asset or if you like, learn and take some wider responsibility for what is going on around. The fruits of your labour it transpired were sweet as you ate what you had had a substantial input into.
The other thing was how since my relationship to a number of people had changed last year increasingly and beyond that of my Caregiver, others hold me account and while there I was subject to house rules and disciplined for any breaches. The person who looks after me also set set some math studying for me to do using traditional teaching methods that I can remember before all the interactive whiteboards and PowerPoint Presentations became the the rage. Though a combination of not caring to check my answers before handing them into be marked and also not paying attention during parts of the class even though I can, when marked I lost marks.
This meant I was put over the desk and spanked on my bare bottom not just by hand but also with a leather Tawse which was really stingy and indeed I can still feel today. I had never been given the Tawse before, not even in official childhood when on the odd occasion a few times I was spanked, usually at school rather than home. As unpleasant as this feels you know, I am not going to ask you to feel sorry for me because this wasn’t something I can’t help and take responsibility for because even with my disabilities I have, I am able to exercise some responsibility.
It links up in some ways with what I was talking about about doing things really, being expected to take more responsibility, showing respect to those who are helping in my learning, even having more self respect. This was a very powerful spanking, easily the most memorable one I have had and yet for all that I’m glad they have chosen to deliver it for this reason: They have decided it’s high time I am to be made to exercise the control and responsibility I do have. They are no longer prepared to spare me the full consequences of my actions for my own good.
*It literally hurts but they ARE right*